Counseling in School: A Need, or a Luxury
The provision of counseling in schools in Nepal is a recent phenomenon. The partnership between parents, teachers and counselors can be of great benefit to children, especially those who are dealing with unresolved problems. We talk with Ms. Sumitra Dhaka
Q. What is counseling?
The meaning of counseling is often misunderstood. It is often said that counseling is where a client sits on a chair and talks, and the counselor gives suggestions. But counseling is more than that. It is where the counselor creates an environment where the client can trust and feel comfortable to share his fears without any hesitation, and makes him more independent and capable of dealing with his issues. The counselor not only listens, but tries to find the root of the problems and provide different techniques to help to overcome that in future.
Q. Why is it important to have counseling in school for children?
It is very important to have counseling in school. Many objectionable things happen in schools, such as corporal punishment, abuse (physical as well as psychological), and some teachers’ behavior that could cause psychosocial problems in the student. And children spend a large portion of their time at school, and with teachers. If there is a counselor at a school, someone children feel secure and safe to talk to about their problems they face at schools and at home, children would be able to focus on their studies and not get into wrong activities. The counselor is usually able to help children by identifying the cause of their problem. If the problem is related to the teacher, the counselor can directly talk to the teacher in order to help the child.
Q. Is there any difference in the need for counseling between boys or girls?
In my center both boys and girls come for counseling. But I personally feel that girls need more counseling as they are often shy about sharing their feelings and emotions with anyone other than their friends, who sometime are not good resources for them to overcome their problems.
Q. What are the symptoms parents or teachers need to look out for in children to determine if they need counseling?
First of all teachers need to be able to identify behavioral patterns that would mean a child needs counseling. Usually the teacher thinks that if a child does not do his homework or is too talkative or disturbs the class, the child should be sent for counseling. This concept is wrong. Counseling does not make a child do his homework or make him not disturb the class. So, it is important to give orientations and workshops to the teachers. Teachers need to understand what are psychosis issues? And they also need to be aware of the behavior patterns of a child that would imply that the child needs counseling.
Q. What are the processes that follow thereafter?
Before counseling we sit with the guardian or the teacher of the child and try to gather as much information about the child as possible, such as his family background, interest of the child etc. Then we meet the child.
Once the counseling session starts, there are assessment processes where we closely watch the child, and try to build good rapport with him through different techniques. After a couple of sessions, we try to identify the cause of the problems. For example we try to identify if the problem is related to teachers, or the child’s parent, or the child himself. Then we deal with the problem accordingly. If the problem is with a teacher then we talk to the teacher, and if it is the parents, we call a meeting with the parents. But if the problem is with the child himself, a regular session is planned to help the child deal with his problems independently.
Q. How can parents and teachers help during the counseling process in school?
While counseling a child we simultemously update the parents or the teachers of the cause of the problem, and the progress made by the child in dealing with the problem. For example, if the child is suffering from a low esteem, it is helpful if parents or teachers are able to identify his good qualities and praise him often. Even if the effort put in by the child is little, praise him for his efforts by saying ‘good work’ or ‘you are making a good improvement’ etc. These encouraging words usually help the child progress faster.
Q. What is the current status of counseling in Nepal?
While most private schools have counselors, public schools do not. The provision of a counselor is in the policy, but it is still yet to be implemented. It is not enough to have counselors in school; they need to be qualified and committed to help the children. In my personal experience there are some schools that have counselors who focus more on school management (working on tasks such as making certificate) than on counseling children. Even when there are many issues that children need counseling on --- issues such as bullying, anger-management, sexual abuse etc. --- counselors at school are busy with other work.
Q. Is counseling in school a need or a luxury?
As a counselor I feel counseling in general is a need. One can go for counseling if he needs to talk to someone who will listen and help him understand his problems and give him simple techniques to deal with these problems. Nowadays children often have many issues they need to deal with: bullying; sexual abuse at school or at home; problems with their friends; or problems at home such as divorce, father or mother working abroad, etc. If they are not able to talk to someone, they vent their suppressed emotions in the form of misbehavior in class, lack of interest in classroom or homework, indulgence in smoking or drugs. If there is qualified and dedicated counselor at the school, the child is able to get help in time, and his academic and personal growth are not hampered.
