Teenage years can be a delicate stage of the human life cycle. A curious mind wanders around various places looking for answers and such is the mind of a teenager. Guidance and influence play key roles in the development of a teenager. In this phase of se

 I didn't want to lie in the first place, but the way our society works compelled me to.Privacy was a theoretical concept in my household.

Human beings basically go through four phases in their lives; infancy, adolescence, adulthood, and dotage. Among these four phases, adolescence is perhaps the most important phase in a human's life. It is a transformational stagewhen childrenstep on the stairs,on a journey towards adulthood. They encounter many parts in between and they must be careful in choosing the right one. The human body goes through a lot of changes during this phase,emotionally and physically.  Since these changes start occurring at the young age of 13 up until the age of 19 and above, the term 'teenager' is used to describe these young people as their age number ends with - 'Teen.'

The teenage years, can also be a delicate stage. It is a stage of self-discovery where people experience different changes within themselves, and which plays an important role in the shaping of their adulthood. From a parent's perspective, this phase can be a really harsh one for them to deal with. Children often seek a certain degree of independence from their parents during their teenage years.Pampering turns into mortification, counseling turns into scolding, and guidance turns into control.During this period it is always a struggle for parent to get closer to their children.Privacy is indeed a necessity for any human being and as such, teenagers require their own space to mature under the proper guidance of their parents.It's always important to maintain a friendly relation with your kid, as a parent, and still respect their privacy.

It is inevitable that you will have arguments on the restrictions you put on their lifestyle. Children nowadays are gaining more exposure to the outer world at an early age thanks to the advent of the internet, cell phones, social media and other technological advancements. Teenagers can be stubborn; they think of themselves as superior to others. But in reality they are very vulnerable and naive. In a way their exposure to the internet can be very beneficial, but at the same time concerns regarding cyber bullying, and other negative aspects of the internet can be worrying.Teenagers these days write their feelings on the walls of their Facebook homepage; and their everyday activitieson Snapchat and Instagram.It's not just the virtual world that make parents worried about their teenage children; cases of suicide, drug abuse, teenage pregnancy, and other similar issues also put fear in the hearts of parents. Himanshu Shrestha, student who is currently employed, shares his experience as a teenager growing up in Kathmandu:"My parents, especially my mother, honestly doesn't know the meaning of privacy. She used to ransack my room, my bag, and my jeans pocket occasionally when I was younger and she does that even now. It is kind of awkward to see her share literally everything that she likes on her Facebook, timeline.  When I think about it that is the reason why I have stopped sharing posts on Facebook. Although I love my mother very much, I feel that there are certain things she shouldn't know about me as she wouldn't understand them. Maybe it's the western movies that instilled the notion of privacy among youths like us. I remember sharing a room with my parents for a long time as a kid.  I finally got a room for myself during my adolescence, but it came with a few rules and regulations.I wasn't allowed to close the door to my room during daytime; a locked drawer or a door would raise suspicion all over the house. It's because of these restrictions that I had to be sly with my parents. I didn't want to lie in the first place, but the way our society works compelled me to.Privacy was a theoretical concept in my household."

Despite their friendly relationship with their parents, teenagers always maintain a certain level of secrecy with their parents. Their first kiss, first drag of cigarette, first fight, and many other things remain hidden. Generally, it is our society that compels kids to lie to their parents. Adolescents have often been raised with high expectations from their parents. With the aim of raising a successful child, parents often forget the needs and desires of their children. While some might obey,many teenagersrebel against such expectations, which creates a tension between teens and their parents.The concept of privacy is not always applicable in our Nepali context.Most of us here fail to respect the concept of individualism, and privacy and individualism are interrelated.   Many youths of this generation are quite fortunate enough to choose their own paths unlike their parents. The children do deserve privacy, but at the same time too much space and freedom can lead them to the wrong paths. There are teenagers who decide to commit suicide, for reasons unknown to the external world. Often considered lonely, they don't communicate with anyone about their personal problems and commit such acts under built up stress.

Mr. Padam Raj Shrestha, father of two daughters, states: "Little freedom means less privacy. More freedom means greater privacy.   There is a thin line that separates these two interrelated terms that often gets abused because of the teenagers' misconception about privacy, which often lead to squabbles and family discord.At times even parents get confused in maintaining the cumbersome equilibrium between freedom and privacy. The fact remains that teenagers often fall victim to bad influence under the guise of freedom when they are unable to distinguish the good from the bad. I believe freedom and privacy are necessary for teenagers as long as they can convince in good faith that whatever they do won't harm the family and a society as a whole."So, in such a delicate phase of life, parents must be really cautious while guiding their children.  One slight error can lead to a never ending vortex of remorse and doubts.Be their best friend, their guardian angel, but at the same time let them also be 'who they are'.

Maintaining a healthy relationship with your teenage kid can be an arduous task. Here are a few tips for parents to help them handletheir wild child:

-Reduce your expectations; assuming your child will start acting like an adult once the puberty starts kicking in.

-It is said that the brain of a teenager is a work in progress.  As such you can expect some impulsive and irrational behavior from your teenage child from time to time. 

-Stop treating your teenager with suspicion and make your home a safer place where she can feel secure from all of her doubts and fears.

-Develop empathy towards your child and try to understand their pressures as well.

-Try to argue less with your teenager as most arguments that you would be having with her would most probably turn out to be irrelevant in the near future.

-In terms of providing proper guidance, you must establish certain boundaries for your children and stick to them.

-Be a healthy host to your teenager's friends and make them feel comfortable around you.