In the society like ours, where talking about sex is still considered a stigma, the QnA with Dr. Krista Rajkarnikar explain something that we all need to know and be aware about.

Unable to grasp the ongoing, unfortunate abuse; a child most likely to develop anger, resentment, insecurity and not to mention low-self esteem

 What is sex abuse OF children?

Sexual abuse towards a child is usually when a child is forced to take part in sexual activities that involves any form of physical penetration. It can also include sexual communication with or without physical contact. For instance, children may also be abused virtually. Any forced behavior or communication of sexual nature towards a person may be classified as sexual abuse.

 What is the prevalence of sexual abuse of children at homes and at schools in Nepal?

Finding reliable and valid data on sexual abuse is particularly difficult in Nepal. This is predominantly because sex abuse is highly unreported as well as unrecorded. In our culture, as well as globally, there may be stigma, discrimination, shame, guilt. Furthermore, a victim may not be fully aware that he/she had been sexually abused. Global statistics, however states that 1 in 20 children are likely to be sexually abused..

 Is there any difference between male and female children in terms of their vulnerabilities?

Both male and females are vulnerable to sex abuse. Research suggests that males might be in a stronger position to fight off the perpetrator, depending on their age. For instance, a male of 14 years of age may be physically strong enough to push away a perpetrator as opposed to a male or female of 5 years of age. Having said that, research also suggests that there is a lot of embarrassment for male victims because of dysfunctional accepted societal norms.

 What are the short term and long term impacts of these abuses?

Short term symptoms can result into long term symptoms if the abused client has not sought out or received help and support.

Short term symptoms are: pain, discomfort, fear, anger, hurt, withdrawn from social activities, agitated or aggressive behavior, inclination towards drugs or other dysfunctional behaviors in some cases.

Long term impacts are: The above symptoms that have gotten bigger over time, usually accompanied by complicated and dysfunctional thoughts, emotions, behaviors as well as abnormal physiological sensibilities.

 How can children be made aware of sexual abuse?

Sexual abuse is a sensitive issue but children and adults need to be made aware of it as it causes high levels of distress, and is really a crime. Awareness should be brought about not only in the school syllabus, but also at home by educating children about sex, trust and ownership of personal identities.

 How can parents help the children in that process?

Since child sex abuse is a highly sensitive issue, it must be dealt with care and empathy. Besides appropriate sex education, trust, honesty and supportive family networks and commutation styles will enable children to feel more comfortable.

 What are the signs parents need to look out for?

If a child has already been abused, be aware of the short term symptoms mentioned above. If these symptoms persist consistently at severe levels, almost every day for more than a period of two weeks, sexually abused or not, a parent should for the child.

 Who are the majority of abusers?

I personally believe we cannot judge who a perpetrator may be before they have been accused and convicted. We should be responsible as adults to teach children safety behaviors and habits. Research does show that in most cases the perpetrator is known to the victim

 What are the different methods schools can use to make the children aware of potential abusers?

Schools could include healthy sex education, helpful and productive communication techniques and safe keeping skills in their syllabus.

 What are the legal provisions on this issue in Nepal?

Sexual abuse is a crime. Please do not hesitate to get help and to report this issue to the authorities if it has affected you or someone who asks you for help.

 Are there any possibilities of denial or ‘blaming the victim’ attitudes from the parents?

Unfortunately, the answer is yes. There is research, but also within our culture parents often do not want to accept something as tragic as sexual abuse could happen to their child. This is where problems such as denial develop.

If a child reports sexual abuse, or abuse of any type, it is the responsibility of the parents or the adults to whom the child confided, to take appropriate action. Listening to the child, and seeking appropriate action and care is highly essential. Do not feel afraid to seek help, if you are not sure of what to do. There are professionals who will guide and support you.

 How can sexually abused children be helped to deal with their situation?

Counseling and psychological interventions are highly recommended. Depending on the level of severity, psychiatric assessment, medication and hospitalization may also be recommended.

 What are the resources for parents to deal with this issue?

There are numerous resources to help parents and raise their confidence in their ability to deal with child sex abuse. Parents can read books, educate themselves and their families as well their children on the role of safe sex, and trust. They can also seek help from professionals for support as well as treatment. It is important to deal with child sex abuse cautiously. I also highly recommend parents of sexually abused child to first calm themselves in order for them to take proper control of the situation.