Table for one, please: How to date yourself.

The beginning of 2024 started with me taking myself on a solo date. I am a strong advocate of romanticizing life and taking solo dates, whether I am single, in a relationship, or married. I have been solo dating since 2016, before it was even a thing.

I planned most of my solo dates in advance, just like you would normally do it for another person. I planned to describe how I was feeling at that particular time—adventurous, romantic, creative—while also keeping in mind if the weather permitted it or not.

 

Well, the agenda for the day was to start the new year by spending the morning at the gym. This is a daily non-negotiation I have on my daily to-do list. First, although it was a lunch date with just myself, I put in the effort to dress up for myself just as I would dress up to impress my date. An outfit that would make me feel elegant, polished, and confident would elevate my look for the day, and I would put on my favourite perfume to smell nice. I am a firm believer, along with a little makeup, that if you look good and smell good, you feel good.

 

 

Before reaching the venue, I stopped by my local florist to pick up some flowers. I bought orange roses beautifully wrapped around a ribbon. To add to that and be a little cheesy and romantic, I bought a little something from an Instagram page that came gift-wrapped. I knew what was inside of it, but I had not seen how it looked, so it added that surprise element to my solo date. It was a warm winter afternoon. I arrived at Piano Piano in Lazimpat. The first thing when I entered the restaurant was that they asked me whether I had a reservation. My answer was no, and the second question they asked me was how many people were joining me, which I proudly said."Table for 1, please!!” I sat down, ordered a cup of warm matcha latte, and to go with it, a warm chocolate lava. I have this weird habit of eating dessert first, even before ordering my starters or mains. Later, I ordered Trecollini—three-color ricotta and mushroom-stuffed tortellini pasta with cheese sauce. Till the time I was waiting for my orders to arrive, I sat there watching the strangers pass by and read a book that I had just started in the morning. I was enjoying every moment of it. My solo date just didn’t end at that restaurant. Later in the afternoon that same day, I drove to Syno Timi to do pottery. Driving there was also like going on a long drive with myself. I sang a playlist of old classic Bollywood songs at the top of my voice, enjoying my own company. Pottery is so therapeutical because the sense of accomplishment after creating something from scratch gives you the self-confidence to do anything, promotes creativity, and also gives you the opportunity to have a digital detox for a while, which is so necessary given that I am on my phone for hours. I did the pottery for 1 and a half hours, which went by so easily, especially chatting with the old uncle, who is so friendly and sweet. At the end of the session, he offered me tea and Yomari, which I consider to have “lucky girl syndrome.” It was a fulfilling start to the beginning of 2024. Going on solo dates is not a phase; it is not a hobby, but a lifestyle. I want to keep on doing this even if I have a boyfriend, even if I am married, and even after I have kids. I will always prioritize my solo date over a date with a man, happily. It gives me so much confidence to just be you. I read somewhere that you cannot It is an opportunity to reflect on what you deserve; fill another empty jar when your own glass is empty. Solo dating is an excellent form of self-love. To be honest, going on solo dates might feel uncomfortable at the beginning to just be by yourself in public places, but you will get used to it after it’s done a couple of times. We might think about what people are going to think, but we have to stop caring about what others think.

 

Once you master the art of solitude, you automatically attract high-quality relationships into your life. You get to know what you are worthy of. Respect, compassion, and the care that’s required in a relationship. I do get asked, Don’t you miss being in a relationship?, Don’t you miss being pampered and the affection you get. Yes, I like being pampered by someone and being loved by someone, not necessarily just romantically, but maybe just my girlfriend, but what is more important to me is the relationship I share with myself at the end of the day. While some dates are properly planned, others are impromptu. There are so many opportunities these days to take yourself on solo dates if you look around. In the last year, I have gone on many movie dates alone, booked a spa date just for myself, went to the Saturday farmers market at Le Sherpa, Lazimpat, and had breakfast in a very busy café. I’ve spent my afternoon in a dreamy garden and just reading books, basking under the sun, visiting art galleries or a bookstore date, getting my nails done, or just simply sipping tea and journaling. Journaling is another act of self-love. Solo dates do not always have to be an outdoor activity. It can be done in the comfort of your home. It can be baking a banana cake, lighting candles, doing something artsy or creative, or just a hair spa. This experience has so many feelings and is an opportunity to get to know myself better. What I like about myself and what I don’t. Not to forget, it is absolutely necessary to take pictures or document it in video because it is always nice to look back and reflect on how far you’ve come in your self-love journey.

 

 

In 2024, maybe I want to solo travel to Bali or Dubai and get a taste of adventure by myself. I am finishing my article here, but I hope this article becomes a sign to take yourself on a solo date. Most of us wait for someone to experience life. Don’t overthink so much; just do it. Be uncomfortable and love yourself.