Malvika Subba, winner of Miss Nepal title of 2002, speaks to Malvika Biswas about her experience of her pregnancy, motherhood, and the challenges of going back to work after the birth of her son.

The bliss of motherhood sometimes express itself in unexpected moments --- the sight of the tender face of a newly born, the touch of its little fingers, and the sound of its first word. We rarely find anyone more invested in loving and caring for a child than its mother. Being a mother is about drawing up strength you never know you had, and dealing with the fears you never imagined existed. Being a mother is by no means an easy feat. Let’s see how a celebrity handles the challenges of motherhood.

Mrs. Malvika Subba won the Miss Nepal title in 2002, and has been an inspiration for many young women of Nepal. Being a new mom and a working woman has added a few extra feathers in this talented mother’s cap. She enjoys going back to work after the birth of her son but she enjoys to a greater degree the experience of her new motherhood. She recently had a heart-to-heart talk with the author on the experience of her pregnancy, motherhood and being working mother.

First thing that came to her mind when she knew she was pregnant

 “Oh no! I am done. Why did I do it?” that’s the first thought that came to my mind. I panicked so much that my husband Riyaz had to calm me down. I panicked because I knew that my body was going to change, my work was going to be affected, and I was no longer going to be the same person. When I think of it now, I find it very funny, but at that point of time that was how I reacted.

The pregnancy photo-shoot and negative responses

Some of my friends insisted that I should capture this beautiful moment, and I thought why not. Initially the photo shoot itself was very difficult but slowly then I started getting very excited about photo sessions shoot. As I was having the child at my thirty’s, it really was a special child. There were a lot of positive responses for my photos, but there were also some negative ones, which was annoying. It made me realize that we still live in a very conservative society where pregnant women are supposed to hide their bellies, and need to be conscious and shy. Women go through a lot of insecurities during pregnancy, and have to deal with the pressure to hide their pregnancy. I think it’s a wrong thing to do as you are putting a negative idea about pregnancy. Pregnancy should be about loving, enjoying the moment, and enjoying motherhood, and treating the woman in a very sensitive manner. I think that this negative aspect has to be changed.

Malvika and Motherhood

We didn’t have plans for having a child this early. I thought that I would have baby when I was 40 or older but not at the moment we did. All of a sudden we changed our minds, I decided to become pregnant. Pregnancy was a roller coaster ride for both of us. When you are pregnant it is a different feeling all together. At the beginning you don’t feel anything because you don’t know what is inside you. Once you see the baby’s ultrasound, you feel baby’s first kick and your body starts getting bigger, that’s when you start really feeling what it means to be pregnant. It then starts becoming very overwhelming. I enjoyed my pregnancy.

I think compared to being pregnant, the process of childbirth and what ensues afterwards, are more difficult. You are dealing with not only your physical difficulties, but also trying to take care of the child. Sometimes the baby would continuously cry for three-four hours. At that point my back would almost give up and the baby would literally fall asleep on my body. Now the baby recognizes us, and smiles at us. It’s been a challenging and a wonderful at the same time. All in all it was an emotional roller-coaster ride.

Most enjoyed role; a public figure, wife, mother

Right now I enjoy being a mother because you get, so much of emotional satisfaction from looking at your child’s face, and looking at him when he smiles, and tries to talk to you. I will never be able to get it back the phase that he is in right now. Every day he is changing and developing. Every little thing he does is a special moment. So I am thoroughly enjoying my role as a mother.

Pregnancy after 30- tough or easy

Pregnancy is not easy. Whether you are in your 20’s or 30’s it is almost the same. Having a baby is the most difficult thing physically and mentally that I have ever experienced in my life. Zayir was born via Caesarian as I had placenta previa and could not go into labor. Placenta previa often occurs to women who are pregnant in their 30’s, and require a caesarean operation. Other than that, it is the same.

Balancing career and parenting

Right after the birth of baby I knew that I had to get back to work some time soon. I prepared myself, my family and the baby as well. We introduced him feeding from the bottle with my breast milk within the first two months. He also started staying with his grandparents. Because he is taken care by his grandparents it’s much easier for me to leave him. During the grandparents’ absence, my husband Riyaz is always there. Now that the baby is three months old, he adjusts very well with his grandparents. So I am back working at Idea Studio.

Fun Facts

• Malvika had a written contract with Riyaz, which stated that he was not allowed to name their child.

• Since their first preference was a daughter, they were hoping for a baby girl.

• Malvika was put off by the smell of mutton during her first trimester and didn’t eat mutton throughout her pregnancy.

• Pregnancy photo–shoot was a gift from actress Priyanka Karki and director Nilu Dolma Sherpa.

• Like Priety Zinta in the movie ‘Salam Namaste’, Malvika once woke up in the middle of the night craving chocolate, but sadly she was not able to obtain chocolate.

• Except for chicken soup and carom soup, she didn’t have any other ‘SutkeriKhana’.

• She had already bought everything required for the baby before his birth.

• Baby Zayir was not the only one crying during his first bath, Malvika was crying with him

 

Malvika’s Pregnancy Do’s and Don’ts

               
Try to be mentally happy. Wear whatever makes you feel comfortable.

Eat well, have lots of proteins and veggies at the same time. Have various dairy products. Don’t have raw fish, papaya, and Sichuan pepper.

                Under the doctor’s advice only then you should exercise. If you have always been a runner then it is advisable to run. There are other forms of exercise such as yoga, walking, or swimming which is helpful to keep you healthy and fit during pregnancy.

The bliss of motherhood sometimes express itself in unexpected moments --- the sight of the tender face of a newly born, the touch of its little fingers, and the sound of its first word. We rarely find anyone more invested in loving and caring for a child than its mother. Being a mother is about drawing up strength you never know you had, and dealing with the fears you never imagined existed. Being a mother is by no means an easy feat. Let’s see how a celebrity handles the challenges of motherhood.

Mrs. Malvika Subba won the Miss Nepal title in 2002, and has been an inspiration for many young women of Nepal. Being a new mom and a working woman has added a few extra feathers in this talented mother’s cap. She enjoys going back to work after the birth of her son but she enjoys to a greater degree the experience of her new motherhood. She recently had a heart-to-heart talk with the author on the experience of her pregnancy, motherhood and being working mother.

First thing that came to her mind when she knew she was pregnant

 “Oh no! I am done. Why did I do it?” that’s the first thought that came to my mind. I panicked so much that my husband Riyaz had to calm me down. I panicked because I knew that my body was going to change, my work was going to be affected, and I was no longer going to be the same person. When I think of it now, I find it very funny, but at that point of time that was how I reacted.

The pregnancy photo-shoot and negative responses

Some of my friends insisted that I should capture this beautiful moment, and I thought why not. Initially the photo shoot itself was very difficult but slowly then I started getting very excited about photo sessions shoot. As I was having the child at my thirty’s, it really was a special child. There were a lot of positive responses for my photos, but there were also some negative ones, which was annoying. It made me realize that we still live in a very conservative society where pregnant women are supposed to hide their bellies, and need to be conscious and shy. Women go through a lot of insecurities during pregnancy, and have to deal with the pressure to hide their pregnancy. I think it’s a wrong thing to do as you are putting a negative idea about pregnancy. Pregnancy should be about loving, enjoying the moment, and enjoying motherhood, and treating the woman in a very sensitive manner. I think that this negative aspect has to be changed.

Malvika and Motherhood

We didn’t have plans for having a child this early. I thought that I would have baby when I was 40 or older but not at the moment we did. All of a sudden we changed our minds, I decided to become pregnant. Pregnancy was a roller coaster ride for both of us. When you are pregnant it is a different feeling all together. At the beginning you don’t feel anything because you don’t know what is inside you. Once you see the baby’s ultrasound, you feel baby’s first kick and your body starts getting bigger, that’s when you start really feeling what it means to be pregnant. It then starts becoming very overwhelming. I enjoyed my pregnancy.

I think compared to being pregnant, the process of childbirth and what ensues afterwards, are more difficult. You are dealing with not only your physical difficulties, but also trying to take care of the child. Sometimes the baby would continuously cry for three-four hours. At that point my back would almost give up and the baby would literally fall asleep on my body. Now the baby recognizes us, and smiles at us. It’s been a challenging and a wonderful at the same time. All in all it was an emotional roller-coaster ride.

Most enjoyed role; a public figure, wife, mother

Right now I enjoy being a mother because you get, so much of emotional satisfaction from looking at your child’s face, and looking at him when he smiles, and tries to talk to you. I will never be able to get it back the phase that he is in right now. Every day he is changing and developing. Every little thing he does is a special moment. So I am thoroughly enjoying my role as a mother.

Pregnancy after 30- tough or easy

Pregnancy is not easy. Whether you are in your 20’s or 30’s it is almost the same. Having a baby is the most difficult thing physically and mentally that I have ever experienced in my life. Zayir was born via Caesarian as I had placenta previa and could not go into labor. Placenta previa often occurs to women who are pregnant in their 30’s, and require a caesarean operation. Other than that, it is the same.

Balancing career and parenting

Right after the birth of baby I knew that I had to get back to work some time soon. I prepared myself, my family and the baby as well. We introduced him feeding from the bottle with my breast milk within the first two months. He also started staying with his grandparents. Because he is taken care by his grandparents it’s much easier for me to leave him. During the grandparents’ absence, my husband Riyaz is always there. Now that the baby is three months old, he adjusts very well with his grandparents. So I am back working at Idea Studio.

Lisa Mukhia Pretet,

Best friend (Malvika Subba)

Congratulations!! To the proud parents Malvika and Riyaz you guys make a beautiful family and welcome chora Zayir love and blessings Your family in France Ayan, Flo and Lisa.

Sanjay Gupta,

Actor, TV / Radio Presenter

I love Malvika and I love Riyaz. I have known them for ever and ever and I love baby Zayir, so lots of love to them for ever and ever and ever.

Sayal Shrestha,

Friend

MalVika Didi, especially, has become the happiest person since Zayir’s birth. Motherhood has made her even more beautiful. Ditto with Riyaz Dai. The parents dote on their angel, and the little one is lucky to have parents like them. It’s a different kind of joy for them, a different beautiful experience. I have nothing but best wishes and tons of congratulations to give to the beautiful parents and also, the angelic little boy. Great great life ahead.”

Abhaya Subba Weise,

Singer, Musician

Welcome to this world Zayir. I would like to let you know that you have a set of rocking parents that the whole nation loves. Blessings and huge congratulations to Malvika and Riyaz on this very happy occasion.

Subexya Bhadel,

Fashion Designer

Congratulations on your first baby! My best wishes are with you and your family. Cheers to you and your growing family. The baby Zayir has got all the charm of Daddy dearest and all the beauty of Mamma darling. The little one will brighten up your life. Congrats and Happy Parenting!

Not just her, I would say, ‘We’ were pregnant. I was very happy with the news. It was tough. First of all it feels like as if you don’t understand your wife, for she goes through a lot of hormonal changes. There is another person growing inside her so she is going through a lot of pain. Though I did not experience a physical pain, the sight of my wife one is so much of pain, was emotionally painful. You just have to wait it up, hang in there, and it will get better. The bottom line is that at the end of the day, all is good. Take good care of your wife as she needs a lot of support. Riyaz

 

 

Malvika’s Pragnancy Experience

First Trimester

In my first trimester I spent a lot of my time crying since I was very emotional. It was all about mood swings. I used to like a lot of spicy food though we are not supposed to eat spicy food during the whole of pregnancy. I put on about five kg right during my first trimester as I started eating a lot. I was exhausted and tired all the time.

Second Trimester

Second trimester was all about feeling good and having fun. I was spending lot of time with my husband and we were planning for the baby.

Third Trimester

And the third trimester was physically very hard. It was difficult breathing and sleeping for me. There was a difficulty moving here and there. But during all my trimesters I still ate a lot (laughs).

I feel like especially with motherhood and the baby, there are so many advices coming from everyone, at the end of the day you should listen to your heart, and do what you feel is right for your child rather than listening to other people. Take suggestions as it comes but at the end it is up to you how you want to bring up your child.